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(no subject) [Jul. 24th, 2005|12:25 pm]
[mood |angryangry]
[music |Gorillaz - Kids with Guns]

I dont know why I let what people say even effect me anymore. I realized a long time ago that as a whole, people are stupid. People are stupid, selfish, and should all just drop off the face of the Earth. I can't pinpoint the exact time I discovered this, but I know that I believe it now more than ever. You guys probably have no idea what I'm talking about, well, maybe one of you. But I'm sure you really don't give a rat's ass. Especially if you think giving a diabetic a candy bar just solves all of their life problems.


Steph is doing so much better. Yesterday Josh & I went to visit her and we couldn't get her to shut up x.x Yep. That's a sure sign that she is back to normal. They are saying Monday she'll most likely get to come home. Yay! That's tomorrow! I'm still trying to figure out how we're going to keep her at a 60 degree angle so we don't pop that sucker out of place... resulting in another surgery.. gaw. That would suck.


Today Josh & I are going to Tacoma to go to Torrid to return the fake-ass stretchy Dickies that I bought offline from them. It's so retarded that the closest store is in Tacoma.... Why not build on closer? Seattle has a lot of chubby chicks... Everett has even more! Gaw, expand your horizons people!! Jeebus.


Right now, I'm sick of everything. I'm sick of my job. I'm sick of living with my parent. I'm sick of trying to save money and it never working. I'm sick of some of my friends. I even get sick of Josh sometimes -- only when he talks to me like I'm 3... after I've told him numerous times that I find it ANNOYING.


And with that -- Adios.

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(no subject) [Jul. 23rd, 2005|12:08 am]
[mood |tiredtired]
[music |Gorillaz - Feel Good Inc.]

So, Steph's surgery was Wednesday.

Her pseudo-hip replacement.

It went well. They expect full-recovery. Day 1 they were able to take her epidermal all. Day 2 they took the cathedor out and had her in a wheel chair. Hopefully tomorrow it'll be crutches. And eventually, with time, physical therapy, and lots of patience -- it'll all heal fine and she can be a "normal" kid again.

Matt went and visited her today. That was very nice of him. He's a good kid. I couldn't see him hurting Stephanie.... Very shy, quiet, and non-sexually driven ^^ That's always a plus.

Nikki put in her two-week notice. w007. No more putting up with her shit.

I need to sleep. 10 - 5 tomorrow. Choi.

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Everyone Needs a Friend Like JoshyuaSan [Jul. 20th, 2005|01:10 am]
[mood |coldcold]
[music |311 - Love Song]

 Sakura Danny:  Dude, I wanna totally come hang out with you and videotape you going off some jumps in the chair.... LOL
 Sakura Danny:  We could become TV stars, dude!!
 Sakura Danny:  All the chicks would totally want you then!
 JJJOOSSHHH:  In conclusion...Don Vito should be the pope...
 JJJOOSSHHH:  Haha...except for the part where i try to go off the jump and end up breaking 43 bones
 Sakura Danny:  lol
 Sakura Danny:  But we'd be famous!
 Sakura Danny:  We can buy you new bones!
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Events of the Past Few Days... [Jul. 16th, 2005|07:08 am]
[mood |tiredtired]
[music |The Jingling of PJ's Bell on her Collar as She Itches a Flea]

Sorry for the lack of update-ness. Had a lot on my mind. And been working like CRAZY. If I'm not working, I'm usually exhausted and just want to lounge around because I'm so tired.


- Went & saw the *MidNight Showing* of Charlie & The Chocolate Factory with Josh... Which was in fact AWESOME like I had predicted. Other than the little teeny boppers who were screaming at the credit "Johnny Depp" that I wanted to slash their throats.... It went fairly well. The hot dogs didn't taste worse than school food.

- Hung out with Tyffani yesterday. Ate Taco Bell. Got many errands done.

- Adventured to the bank with no parking spots and then to Walgreen's Work Hell to pick up Cora's $141 WORTH OF FRICKEN WEDDING PHOTOS!! She better get back from her honeymoon soon and pay me back....!

- Bought a DVD player, ONLY because Josh's mom wasn't home for me to pick up my PS2... My mom wouldn't let me take our DVD player out of the house.... And we had plans to watch CKY 4 in a house with no DVD player... *shrug* It was $38... but then I left the remote at her house so I have to get that before I can return the thing... Yes... I bought a DVD player to watch ONE movie... ONE time... LOL. I rock.

- Waited for the pharmacy to open. Checked to see if our blood pressure was killing us a few times. Played in the condom area. Bleh. We were extremely bored. Discussed highlighting my hair, but I didn't go through with it... Maybe some other day.


As for right now, I'm supposed to be getting ready for work. But I REALLY don't want to go, because this is a Saturday thru Tuesday work marathon. And my next day off, I have plans x.X It's Stephanie's surgery... and I have to be there to document it as this is the first surgery of its kind... Awesome. I'm telling the kid... she needs to write a book.... it'll make a fortune! Then Thursday... which I don't know if I have any plans... I might go to Tacoma because I need to return those Dickies that are actually fake Dickies, so I'll have that money to go buy some new work pants... If I ever find any that I like x.x

Work sucks. Yes it does, yes it does. I'm sick of working.... Mainly because most my paycheck goes to paying bills and junk... like fast food... and random trips that cost a lot of gas.

Speaking of random trips..... I need to get out to Federal Way & see the Whizzinator and Sami Potato.... Hmm.... WHAT YOU GUYS DOING THURSDAY?! Let's go to Ta-Com-A.


I SUPPOSE I'm going to go and get dressed and stuff...... Bleh. Being dressed is over-rated.

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VeGaS oR BuSt [Jul. 13th, 2005|12:58 am]
[mood |gloomysuicidal]
[music |This Providence - To Kill This]


I can't complain. He did exactly what I said. I said:

"If you hate your job so fucking much, go find a new one!"

and I said:

"I'm sick of living at my fucking parents house!"

I did say those things.. But when I said them... I wasn't secretly saying find a career and I want to leave Everett. Hell no.


Even worse, he's not even listening to my perspective on the situation.

I don't want to go. Pure & Simple. I DON'T WANT TO GO.


However, I am saying if he thinks this is some great life changing oppurtunity that he just HAS to take... that I'll respect that... and I'll let him go.

But he says its not like that. It's either both of us go or neither of us go. Unforunately, that's not how it is. He wants go to, I don't. Pure & Simple. And life and its shitty experiences has told me that it's going to end with him going, and me staying. By the way, for the curious, that would be 2.5 years [today] thrown away.


Why? Because it has to do with whats important to us.

Money is important to him. Being fnancially stable is important to him. Living in a huge house, driving a new sportscar, and being able to afford the huge LCD screen TV/monitor that he wants is important to him.

Happiness is important to me. Not really being financially stable but at least being able to pay the bills if sticking with a strict budget and saving for luxeries making them worth more is important to me. Living where-ever we can afford, driving whatever we can afford, and just being with one another is important to me.


And I know I ride him all the time about how we aren't moved out and how he isn't doing anything with his life, and turning down this Vegas job would be a complete contradiction of me bitching at him all the time.

But all I want is an apartment... even if it's just a studio and its the size of a shoebox... a place to call our own...

I find it interesting how he used to be the one to tell me:

" Houses are built with boards & beams. Homes are built with hopes & dreams"

Yet when that saying is needed to be taken into consideration the most -- He forgets it even exists.


With a lack of self esteem
I walked into my teens
And six years later
I'm still frustrated
I'm still not who I want to be
And now it all comes down to
Am I treating her right?
And now it all comes down to
Am I treating her right?
Am I treating her right?

If I could just be
All that I can be for her
That's when I'd be the man I long to be
I hate this cycle
It's a neverending
Story of infinite last chances

And now it all comes down to
Am I treating you right?
And now it all comes down to
Am I treating you right?
Am I treating you right?

I keep telling myself
Just grow up
But it's so easy to say
And so much harder to do
I hear it each and every day
Just grow up
It's the only thing left to do

It's time to kill this
There's no two ways about it
Ends today right here right now
But it's time I learn that
It's not a matter
Of saying the right words
Or singing the right songs

I keep telling myself
Just grow up
But it's so easy to say
And so much harder to do
I hear it each and every day
Just grow up
It's the only thing left to do

It's so old but it's not easy
To say goodbye to all this heartache
To just say no, just run away, endure pain
And suffocate every desire that hurts you

And now it all comes down to
Am I treating you right?
And now it all comes down to this
Am I treating you right?
Am I treating you right?
My words and actions don't align
My heart is the victim of my mind

I keep telling myself
Just grow up
But it's so easy to say
And so much harder to do
I hear it each and every day
Just grow up
It's the only thing left to do

I keep telling myself
Just grow up
But it's so easy to say
And so much harder to do
I hear it each and every day
Just grow up
It's the only thing left to do
[[This Providence - To Kill This]]

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(no subject) [Jul. 12th, 2005|02:52 pm]
[mood |boredbored]
[music |CKY - Sink Into The Underground]

Thirteen random things you like:
01) Photography
02) Music
03) CKY Movies
04) "Making Love"
05) Chuck Taylor Converse
06) Skateboarding
07) Ice Cold Water
08) Going to the Movies
09) BLT sandwiches
10) Hanging with Friends until All Hours of the Morning
11) Energy Drinks
12) Wedding Planning
13) Penguins

Twelve movies (no order):
01) The Pest
02) CKYlandspeed
03) CKY2K
04) CKY 3
05) CKY 4: The Latest & Greatest
06) Haggard
07) Jackass: The Movie
08) Viva La Bam Season 1
09) Viva La Bam Seasons 2 + 3
10) Charlie & The Chocolate Factory
11) Charolette's Web
12) Alice in Wonderland

Eleven good bands/artists (no order):
01) CKY
02) HIM
03) Muse
04) The Used
05) Franz Ferdinand
06) Turbonegro
07) Nirvana
08) This Providence
09) NoFX
10) Green Day
11) Elvis Presley

Ten things about you:
01) I'm a photographer & owner for Side-Project Photography
02) I went to the Zumiez Couch Tour this year and it ROCKED!!
03) I'm engaged to Joshua Wayne
04) My Car is called "The S Car" and I yell "S CAR GO!" at it
05) If I could only listen to 3 bands it'd be: CKY, HIM, and Muse.
06) I own 3 pair of Converses
07) My bass guitar is signed by Green Day
08) I use Clearasel Ultra acne scrub
09) I'm getting a PS3 when it comes out
10) I have a mole on the top of my left foot

9 good friends(no order and only 9):
01) Nolyn [Pair]
02) James [Whizzical]
03) Josh [JoeShwa]
04) Sarah [Sawah]
05) Sami [Sami Potato]
06) Courtney [Stinky Corgy, Terror Twin]
07) Tyffani [Tyff-Dawg]
08) Josh [JoshyuaSan]
09) Stephanie [Steve]

eight favorite foods/drinks:
01) BLT sandwich
02) Bawls
03) French Fries
04) Mochi
05) Mountain Dew
06) Jones Soda
07) Mac & Cheese
08) Ice Cold Wa

Seven things you wear daily:
01) Thick Emo Glasses
02) Jeans
03) Converse
04) Panties
05) Bra
06) Engagement Ring
07) Piercing Stud

Six things that annoy you:
01) Siblings
02) Obnoxious Customers who Come Shop at Walgreen's
03) People who are Into Photography to be "Scenester"
04) Fake People who Lie about Who They are on Their LJ/MySpace/etc to Make Friends
05) Thin People who Bitch They're Fat
06) People Looking for Sympathy

Five things you touch everyday:
01) My Car Steering Wheel
02) Josh [in many ways]
03) Some Form of Music [iPod, CD, CD player, Radio Dial]
04) Shutter Button
05) Keyboard

Four shows you watch:
01) Viva La Bam
02) Boy Meets World
03) Fairly Oddparents 
04) Iron Chef

Three classes you hate:
01) In Middle School: Math, PE, Science
02) In High School: Math, PE
03) In College: Math, Journalism150, Graphic Design

Two people you've wanted:
01) Bam Margera
02) I think that's about it....

One person you could spend the rest of your life with:
01) Josh. Plain and simple.

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WHO the HELL does THAT!?!? [Jul. 10th, 2005|01:02 pm]
[mood |okayokay]
[music |This Providence - Catching my Breath]

OK - Last night was a fawking blast.

Sarah & I hung out after work until the early hours of the morning. We went to Shari's and indulged in some yummy fatty fat deep-fried goodness. OK, I did. Sarah had a salad =P I saw Michelle D...um... D... I can't remember her last name. But she went to Mariner and graduated 2002. She was all popular and had big puffy hair x.x It was funny, in the middle of the meal, I realized how nice it was to actually get to TALK to Sarah, not just LISTEN to Courtney.

We went for a drive, just for the hell of it since neither of us were really tired and we had nothing better to do. I think we ended out somewhere near Kirkland. I dunno. The houses were REALLY fawking nice. Some of 'em looked like 2 or 3 houses put together. Damn. It must be nice. We talked of family issues, of work problems, of friendships and people we once knew, what we think is wrong with us, music, movies, school. It was quite nice. We just kept on driving, because we never ran out of stuff to talk about.

Some how, Wal-Mart got brought up and I said that I think they are open 24-hours. Sure enough, they were. So we parked in the front row [HOLY CRAP! FRONT ROW PARKING AT WALMART?] and hung out there for a while. We looked at clothes and made fun of the old lady pants. Oogled the cookies. And ended up sitting looking at fabrics and pattern books for a good hour. LoL. Just sitting, talking, finding cute clothes, until about 2 in the morning x.x Then we decided we were getting tired and needed to go home.

Went and saw Josh. I was really tempted to just fall asleep at his house, but I knew mom was up waiting for me. That was a surprise. She called and told me she was worried and blah blah blah x.x She hasn't done that for a while. I ran out of cell minutes. Damnit.

And now here I am... I'm tired still. My head hurts. I was supposed to go to work this morning but I talked Nikki into covering my shift and I took her night shift. Which isn't so bad since Sarah is working tonight too. Bwahaha!! I wonder what kind of crazy antics will happen tonight?

Yes, Siry.

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(no subject) [Jul. 8th, 2005|10:21 pm]
[mood |tiredtired]
[music |Dresden Dolls - Coin Operated Boy]

Things that went HORRIBLY wrong today ::

- My starter [we think] died in the S Car. Hence, it acting like a piece of ish lately.

- We ran out of Starbucks way earlier than we should of.

- The wrong wedding was outside when we arrived at the Temple [which was BEA-U-TIFUL BY THE WAY].

- There was multiple photographers... which I was NOT told or I would of called the whole thing off. I work - ALONE [except my lovely assistant, of course XD]

- It was pouring down rain - 90% of the day which limited the outside photos.

- The bride & groom left us behind when we were trying to follow them to the Groom's Luncheon.

- We beat them, but didn't know if we were in the right spot.

- No one bothered to tell me it was at an apartment complex named Madison Park, not an ACTUAL park.

- It was cramped and uncomfortable.

- I only got to see Josh for 10 minutes before he had to run off to work.

- I passed out at Tyff's and nobody could wake me up.

- The directions were 50/50 wrong and right.

- I was bossed around by Mormons.

- I still felt weird.

- Even MORE photographers showed up.

Things that went RIGHT today ::

- Bringing ALL my film was a good idea.

- We always ended up at the right place at the right time.

- I got some awesome shots, I know it.

- Met some nice people, even if they were a little touchy-feely.

- Tyff & I had fun chilling together

And lastly... Cora and Brad were just so happy =) I'm excited about my own wedding even more now.

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(no subject) [Jul. 7th, 2005|10:41 am]
[mood |disappointeddisappointed]
[music |Andrew W.K. - She is Beautiful]

I have nothing interesting and worthwhile to update on, guys o.o I'm sorry. Maybe if my life were a little more interesting, but it's not. It's actually a big waste of time... a big waste of flesh, bones, and blood... a big waste, period!

The S Car died. It finally happened. Yesterday, it was acting weird everytime I started it up.... But then when I got home after work, I shut it off and went to start it up again to see if it would repeat it's stupid actions -- and it wouldn't even start. James was up until about 2 AM trying to figure out what's wrong. I'm just like... Great... How the hell am I supposed to get to work today? OR EVEN BETTER -- How am I supposed to get to Bellevue for Cora's wedding ceremony.... Bothell for the Groom's Luncheon... and then Woodinville for the Reception/Ring Ceremony...? Great... Just great... My first wedding gig and the S Car ruins it for me. You REALLY ARE The Shitty Car!!

I'm still sick. Getting better, slowly but surely. I think anyway. Coughing is starting to hurt though.

Apparently Courtney, Nikki, and Sarah have decided they are going to Shari's after work on Friday >.> Jeez, and there's any question as to why I always feel left out? Nikki invited me but.... I don't want to go, especially not after having to hang out with Cora and her Morman family peoples all day x.x Fine... Nikki can just replace me. Whatever. I don't care anymore. I knew friendships weren't worth while.


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My Lungs - They Hurt. [Jul. 5th, 2005|07:16 am]
[mood |groggygroggy]
[music |None. Silence. The Fan And That's About It.]

Didn't do anything for the 4th. I'm sick as a dog, so going out wasn't an option. I figured Josh's family would leave and we'd just cuddle and watch a movie [Hmm... maybe like Independence Day]. But NoOoOoO. As usual, they ruin a perfectly good evening by staying home... Yes, at their home... I know it makes no sense. Shut up.

Lit off fireworks. The neighbors were being jerk-offs and setting off tons of firecrackers. Ugh. I hate those things. Watched the big firework show in Seattle at Gas Works Park, even though Family Guy was on and we wanted to watch that more. But to please his mother - we watched the fireworks on TV..... fireworks... on... TV.... >.>

But then I had to go home. Why? So I could wake up bright and early at the buttcrack of dawn to go to work.... Even though nobody comes in and wants film developed at 8 in the morning? Why? Because they are more likely than not SLEEPING!! What do jobs have against the concept of sleep? o.o I swear, one day, I won't have to work there.... Yep. I just keep telling myself that. Josh'll have a nice secure stable job [more likely than not having to do with computers]... and I'll get to do what I'm passionate about [that being photography]... and we'll all live happily ever after.

Unforunately, then I wake up and realize the chances of that happening are slim to known. Reality is more like.... I'll be stuck at that hell hole Walgreen's for the rest of my life >.> And Him? Meh, I don't know...

OoOo! A thermometer! Let's take my temperature...

*waiting....waiting....more waiting....*

It says.... 98.2. Hm. I'm a little chillier than usual today.

But no fever... Thus I have to go to work. But please, don't mind my excessive coughing and inability to swallow/breathe/talk/etc.

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